就像蝴蝶飞不过沧海，没有谁忍心责怪

There are times in life when we will all be confronted with something that you desire to have the most, something that means a great deal to the meaning of our lives to which we are willing to give something up or change just to accommodate it.

To everybody, that something is rarely petty or shallow - it is often a thing that has either fulfills the value that one holds or actualises his or her own dreams and aspirations.

To married couples their single most aspired dream come true would be to have a child that would complete the reason for their union in the first place and begin a family together. When it did happen, just look at them giving up all their own comforts and personal needs just to make sure that their precious offspring are accorded the best future possible. Until they hit puberty and start acting emo, which is another story altogether...

An athlete would train day and night to build their stamina, strength and skill to be become the world's best, working harder than they need, pushing their limits beyond what is necesary. Becoming the best in the world is the crowning glory to their entire career.

A science researcher would gladly ignore friends and leisure, using as much time as they can to produce vaccine to the deadliest diseases in the world, putting themselves in danger by getting exposed to the deadly pathogens that they vow to put an end to, for the sake of ending the cycle of death that destroyed futures before they can begin. His journey would reach the pinnacle when the vaccine becomes real and can be mass developed to begin the end of a scourge and bring hope to dreams.

As much as we would love for dreams to come true, regardless of how true its aims, whatever the goal - it can be heartbreaking sometimes when you miss what is to be the opportunity of a lifetime due to technicality or a situation that makes it a bigger loss than a gain.

Take for instance Roy Keane, the former captain of Manchester United and Ireland - he was a great midfield general, even the most blinkered of Liverpool fans would admit how influential he was to the Red Devils. In 1999, he would miss out in appearing in possibly the highest level of professional football competition in the European Cup final by picking up another booking that would lead to a suspension.

Lesser players would have wilted and broke down, losing the very edge that made them they very winners that they could be but Roy played on with unquestionable determination and tenacity to make sure that his team makes it to the finals. They eventually won the Cup - he got a medal of course - but the very bit of missing the actual match itself, leading the best team in Europe to victory must have hurt him deeply.

We all face things like this at least once, if not frequently. Our reactions to disappoinment is either what differentiates betwen one person to another. Some would simply make peace for it is either not within their right to obtain or they see the risk of damage by reaching for it. Another person might keep it bottled and remember it as a bitter pill to swallow that changes their lives, a reminder of a denied opportunity by an unfair world. And of course those who become subjects of movies, novels and inspirational stories - people who rebel against 'fate' and decided to change the rules and achieve what they want anyway, oftimes sacrificing much of themselves to gain something that they consider to be of equal worth.

I would be lying if I said I have never needed to walk down the path of cold rain knowing that you can't stop droplets of water from falling from the skies. One feels as if the world conspires to deny you what you have wanted the most by dangling it in front of your face like a carrot on a string and yanking it away when it is within touch.

"I just washed the damn car!"

It would also be lies if I said I have made peace with it all - some of the disappoinments will remain bitter thoughts of something that could be but never will because it is not within your control. Metaphorically speaking, it's like something that will disappear when you reach for it, but will remain there if you don't.

I used to make analogies for things like this, including a butterfly that stops by your garden that you painstakingly tended - you can't reach for it or it flies away. A real life analogy would be like the cats I see along the street when I walk to and from my house - I'd like to pat and stroke their fur but the moment I get too close they get ready to scamper off; come no closer and they happily lick themselves with a little acknowledgement that a big hairless ape is walking by.

I prefer beetles - they don't run very fast.

But at the end of the day, understanding that we are part of a grander scheme of things would probably help in accepting that you did what you could in your part - the rest is not in your hands to give.