More KTM Stuff

If I were to note down everything there is to say about KTM Berhad this place would be called the KTM Blog instead of the sumptuous noodles that I am currently craving so much for (note to self : get some this coming Saturday). Besides, being new to the whole environment - I began taking the train two months before the fuel hike - there's bound to be new things to write about until I get bored of it eventually.

I already am considering that I am taking it on a daily basis to work so my input on the matter is just as valuable as the veterans and newbies alike who squeeze in and become part of the proverbial sardine community every day.


Canned Sardines

There's something about Friday that makes causes an unexplainable surges in the number of passengers who try to board the train home. On normal days, by 7:00 pm the rows of people who wait for the train at the KL Sentral platform would normally thin down to two until eight. On Fridays however, it stays at four until 8:30 pm.

One feasible explaination that I can think of is possibly the coming of the weekend. Nobody is in a hurry to get back so everybody decided to arrive around 6:00 pm or so.

I was caught in one of those last Friday and sufficed to say the word 'packed' doesn't do justice to the situation in the train. People kept pushing in when there is already space so much so that I could actually hold on to nothing and not fall forward/backwards when the train stops. Everybody is caught in the 'wave', especially those in the centre without support so when the train stops, everybody become everybody's cushion.

It came to mind that I pity the ladies on trains of such. There is pretty much no protection for them from men who think of taking advantage as they have little choice but get squeezed to the person in front, beside or behind them. Of course there are guys who only care about getting off at their destinations but I could only imagine the risks the women are taking when they get on the train as such.

In Japan they have women-only coaches to help reduce the number of incidents and better protect them and I do feel like such coaches would be useful here considering how much more conservative we are in this country.

And then you have women who either enjoys it e.g they push closer - yes, I was the 'victim' a couple of times, considering there is actually space for them to stand away from me; or they really don't bother and use taller guys as their 'pillar of support' by leaning in.

As a normal heterosexual guy, I would be expected to enjoy this but there's just this little voice inside that appeals to the gentleman in me, so I try to always have a bit of a space between me and the women in front of me (sorry about those at the back and the sides - you are the one(s) pushing me around).

Hard to believe I know, yeah, like what Roy of the IT Crowd bellows into the phone, I am from the past. I can only imagine the thoughts going through the heads of their parents or husbands.

The ride home was pretty bad but being a Friday evening, everybody were in a good mood as perfect strangers were actually joking with one another. The loose cannon was a KTM Officer who was hitching a ride to Pantai Dalam, making fun of the situation. The first stop at Angkasapuri had him joking about it being the stop for future artistes and the second at Pantai Dalam being the destination of future Prime Ministers.

Then it was all up close and personal all the way to where I got off. It was so 'up close and personal' that half of the train would probably be certified married by the time it reaches Subang.

At least the air-conditioner was strong though as the heat generated from the masses of sweaty bodies and breath would have caused it difficult to breathe.

Got off 30 minutes later and the number of passengers thinned down by almost half, giving much respite to those on their way to Port Klang.

You could almost hear the collective sighs of relief when the door opened.


Scatological Stories

... is but a scientific term to describe topics related to... solid toilet by-product.

One advice to prospective commuters: make sure your bowels are not acting, in the process off or not well dealt with before hop onto the next ride to wherever you are going.

Imagine having something threatening to push out from your backside, coupled with being squeezed from every direction and the knowledge that a proper toilet is still 15 minutes away - you will literally feel like the weakest person on earth hoping for deliverance to come. The train would also stop at times to allow another one on the same path to leave, so that few minutes of waiting will make the most atheist of us a believer.

It happens to me (to everybody, in that matter) once in a while, thanks to my 'toilet training' that seems to pretty accurately have... things... waiting to be expelled around the period of 7:00 - 7:30 am and 9:00 - 9:30 am.

Sounds amazing that you can actually control and tell you bowels when to act up, but it is true. Even if you don't feel like going at all, try going to the loo, sit on the throne or squat, try to ... push. At first it would be ridiculous to be doing so without nothing coming out, but in time your body will start to adjust itself and become regular.

Enough of this crap.


Thank You

... is still pretty regularly heard nowadays in these times no thanks to the advent of political correctness, but how many of them actually comes from the heart rather than from the head (of the departments) ?

Imagine my surprise and amusement (in the good way) of being greeted with a thank you by an attendant of KTM at KL Sentral this morning after touching the TnG card to the reader. He seems to be in a good mood and thank every single person who presented him with the ticket.

I don't know whether it all came from his heart or head, but to do so will need more than an instruction from the departmental leads to keep doing amidst hundreds of people passing through.

I salute you sir.