Angel

ANGEL
Sarah McLachlan
"Surfacing", 1997

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
There�s always one reason
To feel not good enough
And it�s hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I�'ll find some peace tonight

***In the arms of an/the angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You�re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there

So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
There�s vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It don�t make no difference
Escaping one last time
It�s easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

***


I simply adore this song.

I first heard of Ms McLachlan when we first had Channel [V] - anybody remember Nonie Tao, Nadya Hutagalung, Sonia Couling? - through excess broadcast signal from neighbouring Brunei, her MV of Sweet Surrender. The first thing that came to mind was how utterly enchanting that voice is - soft yet powerful, firm yet poignant. She could sound like pleading yet never to the point of whining, the voice so clear, forcing you to listen to the lyrics.

It wasn't until Angel that I considered her to be one of the best female singers out there, the song made famous by being the soundtrack to the movie City of Angels starring Meg Ryan and Nicholas Cage. By then it comfortably dethroned Vanessa William's Colours of the Wind as my all time favourite song.

I never watched the movie though - thought it was all too soppy for my tastes but I'll probably do so the next time I could after learning to appreciate the deeper meanings to movies rather than just explosions and the US saves the world elements to most screenings nowadays.

The meaning to the song differs from person to another though. Whilst the mainstream idea is about balm in times of trouble or comfort in the passing of a loved one, one interpretation was about heroin.

Ms McLachlan wrote this song as a tribute to her friend, the drummer of Smashing Pumpkins who died from heroin overdose. The lyrics could be an allusion to the 'weightlessness' as carried by angels and the feeling of release from the sufferings of the day. Ms McLachlan explained, "there's nothing constant when you are on the road; everything becomes the same".

I'm not sure what that meant, though it didn't quite endorse the idea that she sang about heroin as the angel of comfort. Yet it didn't stop people from using it as the theme song during tragedies - New York 9/11, Columbine High School Massacre - or funerals.

As for me, I'm don't have to be listening to the song for comfort but it does actually afford a moment or so of solace, like the sound of crushing waves on a beachside after a long day or a kitten's mew when you were bored out of your skull. Time would often stood still when I have it on, as if transported to an auditorium where the only thing visible were Ms McLachlan and a microphone stand, illuminated by a spotlight shrouded by total darkness.

Unbelievable.